I'll Miss You!
So today I head to my grandparents for the night and tomorrow morning I will be headed to camp. After camp I’m going to the cottage which has dial up but we don’t really use it. I guess what I’m saying is: you probably won’t hear from me again until August 3. And I will miss you all so much! SRSLY. Tumblr hasn’t been working for me all day and I had so many things...
Not all styles fit me in a 20 (fun fact: I have huge calves, and legs in general) but my favourite ones did and that’s what counts!! It was nice having loose pants for a while but then they started to look so unflattering that I felt fat in them! Weird I know…
The thing about musicals at an all-girl high school is that the taller girls have to play guys. Which often worked out fine for me because I couldn’t sing but many musicals have a male speaking-only lead. Which is how I came to play Mayor Shinn in The Music Man in gr.11. My whole family has gotten our hair done by Anna since I was about 6. Years ago she opened her own salon with her sister...
My pants were beginning to get ridiculous. I wanted clothes that would fit for running around the woods. I walked into the store wearing a size 24….. and walked out with two pairs of 20s!!! It. Feels. So. Gooooooood.
I really love when people post a song they’ve been exercising to - especially when it’s awesome and something I’ve never heard before!! Thanks guys!
Thank You Thank You Thank You, for making me feel...
smaller-n-smaller replied to your photoset: This is it! The big 100! So many postsssss! I was… You’re so pretty!!!! You should totally made that your profile picture. Bed hair and all!! texasmyway replied to your photoset: This is it! The big 100! So many postsssss! I was… hi margaret!! so happy to see your face : onwiththenew replied to your photoset: This is it! The big 100!...
Last week: 272.2 This week: 267.6 Difference: -4.6 I’m pretty darn pleased. Mostly because this marks a change from my half-assing it the past few weeks. It feels good to be committed again. Putting in hard work and seeing results: nothing like it!
THAT WAS SO MUCH SCARIER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD...
texasmyway-deactivated20110730 asked: hi love, thank's for the follow!! i'm super stoked to read about all about you (is that weird?!) don't be a stranger!!
I snapped at my mother, I almost cried at the gym, and I just had a complete breakdown when a friend cancelled our plans for tonight. I did not realize until today how much my toxic work environment is affecting me. My head hurts now, is how much I was crying and it was NOT simply over spilt (never ordered) milk (martinis). I am a mess.
This is my first non-scale victory. I’ve been feeling a little bit left out, especially since for a while there my scale victories seemed slow in coming. But today was a good day again! Not because of my weight loss but because of my courage and determination and a shift in my mindset. I went swimming. In public. My neighbours have a club membership (not as fancy as it sounds) so N...
While I was writing that someone unfollowed me and I am again at 59 - I just thought that was too funny!
I was so close to the 260s and I was had 58 followers when I said (to myself): ‘You need to reach the 260s before you get 60 followers.’ Yesterday morning my scale said 269.8 and my dashboard said 60 followers, thanks to laurasgonnalose who was the 60th and helped me meet my goal!! OMG you guys! AHHHHHHH!!!!! Does that ten number changing make everyone feel this good?? It is the best...
Does anyone else ever just run out of things to say? This never happens to me in person!
Just a little reminder
On facebook under the profile picture there is a blank space for a quotation or lyric or motto and mine says ‘i got life’. It has been there for months but today a friend pointed it out with a post on my wall that said ’you got life, eh? that’s good!’ Speaking of my fav musicals, Hair is number one. I Got Life is a fabulous song and I needed to be reminded of...
Last week: 273.8 This week: 272.2 Difference: -1.6 It’s a loss and that is something but I am still getting a little frustrated. I know I could be doing so much better! I want to be out of the 270s as of three weeks ago. But there is no stopping me this week. I am rounding the corner of this slump slowly but I think I’m ready to start moving forward again, and fast. Here we go!
It is hard sometimes
when you have gone away for university and five years later come home for a summer. You have very few friends left at home and the ones that are all cancel on you!!!! On Sunday I had a coffee date with one of my loves from hs, E, who just got back from Greece but had to make a last minute trip to PEI (by last minute I mean she left a message cancelling two minutes after she was supposed to pick me...
That felt GOOD.
This is what I realised yesterday:
If I only change my diet, it is only about weight loss. If I want to reconnect with my body, I have to use it!!! Off to the gym…. for realz this time.
I want to show my face so so badly!
But for all the wrong reasons: I sometimes think I am pretty and want everyone to know that I am not just a grainy torso of disgusting fat with underwear on. I am resisting because the reason I want to post it is stupid and the opposite of the crap I am supposed to be working on - that all of me is me and all of me is good enough. On the other hand, if I were a reader I would want to see my...
Since I seem to be on a movie roll
I don’t know if everyone is aware, but I am a student. I study film and theatre. And I am often embarrassed by my lack of film knowledge. For example: until last Saturday, I had never seen All About Eve. Which is a classic movie….. about theatre! What is wrong with me guys?!?! But it was increadible. An instant favourite. Everyone needs to watch it. Now. (especially smaller-n-smaller...
Remember when I said I was going to the gym yesterday? I do. And I also remember telling myself that as a reward for going I would use the free rental at VD certificate I had that would expire yesterday. You know what else I remember? Not going to the gym. And then deciding to use the free rental anyway so as not to waste money later in the week. And then finding it difficult to muster the energy...
My love of VD
In the town where I attend university there is a video rental place called Classic Video. It is a nice place with friendly people and many many movies you could never find at a Blockbuster. Profs and students are very fond of CV and that is fine; they have probably never been to Halifax. (Which is where I live by the way… there, now I’ve told you) In Halifax we have Video Difference....
Here it is. Last week = 274.6 This week = 273.8 After math = -0.8 Not my finest hour but it is going in the right direction… at least from last Wednesday. If I were counting from Monday it would be +2.2 But today is a new day. A day with makeup. A day with a nice work outfit. A day with sushi for lunch. A day with the gym this evening. A good day. And a great start to this WIWeek.
I am feeling a little better
My neighbour is coming over to watch a certain guilty pleasure on my laptop. I think the company will help me. Setbacks are bound to happen. Tomorrow is another day. I have proven to myself HOW MANY TIMES? and IN HOW MANY WAYS? that I am strong and capable of authoring my own life and turning difficult situations around. Same thing with this weight loss. I am just going to keep on proving it to...
I have hit a slump and I have hit it hard. Yesterday and today I have been bingeing. I have a few ideas why but no motivation to stop it. Someone help!!
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
I really do love my grandparents… but if they would just shut their mouths about the proposed name change to Stanley Park I would love them so much more. And be less likely to die at 30 of a heart attack caused by high blood pressure caused by the rage I feel at the nonsense I have to listen to sometimes. UGHH.
To Grandmother's House
So I took today off of work and drove with my mother to Fredericton where my grandparents live. The long drive meant I have not eaten so well today but it could have been much, much worse. It isn’t really bothering me at all right now because, guess what? I hope you are getting good at this game by now. I went for a run!!! Outside!! In a different city!! The weather was gorgeous, my shins...
Is it just me or have I gotten really wordy? Self-important much? Sorry.
smaller-n-smaller asked: Wow. We have a lot in common. My starting weight was 280. I'm 5'11 (go tall girls!) and I'm 23 too! You are so brave posting pictures. It was really hard for me to do so. Let's be each others support!
Happy Canada Day!
Yesterday my mother (who does not know I am trying to lose weight) told me my pants looked loose. Still feeling good about that one.